Reinforcing your child's commitment to Jiu Jitsu

Parents here are some tips to encouraging attendance. 

a) Do you value the activity? Take a good hard look at what your child is involved with and determine if this activity will enhance your child’s future.

b) Don’t force your child to do something, RE-enforce them! Continue to talk about the benefits of an activity and the progress your child is making. If you reinforce these positive attributes, you won’t have to force the activity on them.

c) Have discipline. Your child only stays home from school when they’re sick, right? It’s the only time they should miss their activity as well. If you’re wishy washy on your child’s activities, they’ll be wishy washy on their commitment level as well.

d) Lead by example. This is a classic example of walking the walk. Either get involved with your child or show them that you value a very similar activity for yourself.

e) Parents should control all the child’s activities thought the day. What activity are you allowing your child to do in the hour prior to the Jiu Jitsu classes? If they are playing video games, or playing outside with friends, enjoying freedom riding their bikes with friends, it is almost certain that when you call them to get ready for class they will give you a hard time. Which child wants to trade an environment where they have freedom for another one where they will be under supervision, being told what to do, having to exercise, follow rules, exercise critical thinking, etc...? Perhaps, have them doing homework or chores right before class , this will get them looking forward to going to Jiu Jitsu classes.

f ) Parents must be supporters and not only critics. They have to understand the the most important win is not the arm bar that their child was able to apply on their training partners but the life lesson that their kids are learning throughout their martial arts journey. The big win is not to build strong kids but to raise strong adults. It is to provide them with experiences on the mats and tournaments that will build character and give them tools to grow up strong and become successful adults. So often we see a parent that is very into performance on the mats and compare his/her child with other kids. That is a very detrimental to their own child. The number one thing that kids want is to make their parents happy. And every time a parent is over coaching a child, or comparing them negatively with other kids, the only message that their are passing is “you are not good enough”. And that will be just a matter of time for the child to ask to quit. The best thing a parent can say to a child is “I love watching you training.” The same is true for competitions and here are the three things all parents should say to their kids at competitions:

- Before: Have fun. Play hard. I love you.
- After: Did you have fun? I’m proud of you. I love you.